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nà yě bùjiànde ，yǒuxiē dàhù rénjiā háishì huì xiān yòng zhèyàng de fāngshì gěi zǐnǚ zhǎo duìxiàng ，Zhōngguó chuántǒng de hūnyīn jiùshì zhǔzhāng “méndānghùduì ”de ，zhǐ bùguò gǔdài de xiàngqīn shì shuō le méi ，ràng shuāngfāng de jiārén jiànmiàn ，xiàn zài de xiàngqīn shì nánnǚ shuāngfāng hé jiārén yīkuàir jiànmiàn 。

Not necessarily, some wealthy families still resort to this kind of thing first to find partners for their sons and daughters. Traditional Chinese marriages advocated unions between families of similar social stature, it's just that in ancient times the arranged dates involved letting the families of the two parties meet after a match was made, now the arranged blind dates involve the two parties and their families meeting together.

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完美的爱情就是可以不完美，完美的婚姻就是当这婚还没有结。而且我一想到有一天你会死掉，就忍不住要对你好一点。

wánměi de àiqíng jiùshì kěyǐ bù wánměi ，wánměi de hūnyīn jiùshì dāng zhè hūn hái méiyǒu jié 。érqiě wǒ yī xiǎngdào yǒu yī tiān nǐ huì sǐdiào ，jiù rěnbuzhù yào duì nǐ hǎo yīdiǎn 。

Perfection in love is that it can be imperfect, the perfect marriage is one that hasn't happened yet. And whenever I think that one day you'll die, I just can't help being a little nicer to you.

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你怎么能这么淡定呢，你不担心你家那位金屋藏娇啊？我们的婚姻法已经那么坑爹了，不给点舆论压力，岂不是更助长了出轨男人的气焰？

nǐ zěnme néng zhème dàndìng ne ，nǐ bù dānxīn nǐ jiā nà wèi jīnwūcángjiāo ā ？wǒmen de hūnyīn fǎ yǐjīng nàme kēngdiē le ，bù gěi diǎnr yúlùn yālì ，qǐbùshì gèng zhùcháng le chūguǐ nánrén de qìyàn ？

How can you be so calm? Aren't you worried about your husband taking a mistress? Our marriage law is already such a joke, so if there is no pressure from public opinion, wouldn't that just be more wind in the sails of cheating men?

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也是，如今社会发展快，诱惑也越来越多，男人出轨的成本也太低了，连婚姻法都几乎都是保护男方权益的。所以他们对于离婚毫无畏惧。

yě shì ，rújīn shèhuì fāzhǎn kuài ，yòuhuò yě yuèláiyuèduō ，nánrén chūguǐ de chéngběn yě tài dī le ，lián hūnyīn fǎ dōu jīhū dōu shì bǎohù nán fāng quányì de 。suǒyǐ tāmen duìyú líhūn háowú wèiju 。

I guess that's true. Now as society is developing so fast, there are also more and more temptations and the costs for men cheating really are so low. Even the marriage law is more geared towards protecting the rights of men. So they have no fear of divorce at all.

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说得没错，另外，80后独生子女大都自私傲娇，心智不够成熟，在婚姻生活里大多也不懂得退让不会用心经营，从某种程度上也造成如今社会的高出轨率。

shuō de méicuò ，lìngwài ，bālíng hòu dúshēngzǐnǚ dà dōu zìsī àojiāo ，xīnzhì bùgòu chéngshú ，zài hūnyīn shēnghuó lǐ dàduō yě bù dǒngde tuìràng bùhuì yòngxīn jīngyíng ，cóng mǒuzhǒng chéngdùshàng yě zàochéng rújīn shèhuì de gāo chūguǐ lǜ 。

You're right there. As well as that, the only children born in the 1980s are mostly all selfish and arrogant, and aren't very mature. They mostly don't understand how to back down in their married lives and don't make concerted efforts to make their marriages work. In a certain sense, this has also led to the high rate of cheating in today's society.

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是呀，假使男人的教育背景里深深植入了契约精神，那么婚姻对他来说就是神圣的，打破契约自己都会觉得羞耻。人毕竟有别于一般动物，因为人有自我意识能自我控制。

shì ya ，jiǎshǐ nánrén de jiàoyù bèijǐng lǐ shēnshēn zhírù le qìyuē jīngshén ，nàme hūnyīn duì tā láishuō jiùshì shénshèng de ，dǎpò qìyuē zìjǐ dōuhuì juéde xiūchǐ 。rén bìjìng yǒubiéyú yībān dòngwù ，yīnwèi rén yǒu zìwǒ yìshi néng zìwǒ kòngzhì 。

Yeah, if there was a contractual mentality deeply embedded in men in their educational background, then they would think of marriage as sacred and they would feel ashamed if they broke that contract. Humans differ from animals after all because humans have self-awareness and self-control.

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其实啊，中国女性真正经济人格独立的屈指可数。在痛苦不堪的婚姻下她们多半还是会选择默默忍受。

qíshí ā ，Zhōngguó nǚxìng zhēnzhèng jīngjì réngé dúlì de qūzhǐkěshǔ 。zài tòngkǔ bùkān de hūnyīn xià tāmen duōbàn háishì huì xuǎnzé mòmò rěnshòu 。

Actually, you can count on your fingers the number of Chinese women who are financially and emotionally independent. However miserable their marriages, most of them still choose to put up with it in silence.

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嗨，就别钻牛角尖了，咱们不能因噎废食啊，“你若盛开，蝴蝶自来”，只有更好的自己才能遇到更靠谱的对方，再说了婚姻也得靠经营，你别“忧国忧民”了，先脱单再说。

hāi ，jiù bié zuān niújiǎojiān le ，zánmen bùnéng yīnyēfèishí ā ，“nǐ ruò chéngkāi ，húdié zì lái ”，zhǐyǒu gèng hǎo de zìjǐ cáinéng yùdào gèng kàopǔ de duìfāng ，zàishuō le hūnyīn yě děi kào jīngyíng ，nǐ bié “yōuguóyōumín ”le ，xiān tuōdān zài shuō 。

Huh! There's no point in going into that mire. We can't stop eating for fear of choking. It's only when a flower opens that a butterfly may deign to land on it. It's only when you're being your best you that you'll meet someone more reliable. And another thing, marriages are all about how you manage the relationship. First find a way out of singledom, then you can express your lofty concerns about the nation and the people.

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是啊，这又是老生常谈的婚姻观念的问题了，是选择差距悬殊的所谓真爱，还是选择门当户对的感情。

shì a ，zhè yòu shì lǎoshēngchángtán de hūnyīn guānniàn de wèntí le ，shì xuǎnzé chājù xuán shū de suǒwèi zhēn ài ，háishì xuǎnzé méndānghùduì de gǎnqíng 。

Yes, this is a commonly acknowledged problem with the concept of marriage, the choice between true love across the poverty gap, or choosing a relationship with someone from a similar socioeconomic background.

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中国传统价值观念里，对于婚姻一直是主张门当户对的，一方面是因为门当户对可以保证夫妻家庭背景、受教育程度、及观念的相对平衡。

Zhōngguó chuántǒng jiàzhí guānniàn lǐ ，duìyú hūnyīn yīzhí shì zhǔzhāng méndānghùduì de ，yīfāngmiàn shì yīnwèi méndānghùduì kěyǐ bǎozhèng fūqī jiātíng bèijǐng 、shòu jiàoyù chéngdù 、jí guānniàn de xiāngduì pínghéng 。

In the traditional Chinese value system, there was a constant advocacy for marriage between people from similar socioeconomic backgrounds. Firstly, because they are from similar socioeconomic backgrounds, you can guarantee that the family background, educational level and value system of husband and wife will be relatively equal.

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