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wǒ yǒu ge hùshi péngyou shuō shì jiāzhǎng xiǎngyào nǚxu le ，suǒyǐ xiǎng rènshi rènshi Xīn péngyou 。dànshì tā kě tiāoti le ，tā kāi chūlái de zhēngyǒu tiáojiàn ，ràng rén kàn le dōu shǎyǎn 。

I have a nurse friend who says that her parents want a son-in-law, so she wants to meet new friends. But she’s very picky, and her list of boyfriend criteria is really shocking.

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我呢，实在是想笑，可又想给男朋友塑造一个有“傻白甜”女友的形象，于是就淡定地举杯灌了一大口水。

wǒ ne ，shízàishì xiǎng xiào ，kě yòu xiǎng gěi nán péngyou sùzào yī gè yǒu “shǎ bái tián ”nǚyǒu de xíngxiàng ，yúshì jiù dàndìng de jǔbēi guàn le yī dà kǒu shuǐ 。

Me? I really felt like laughing, but I also wanted to give my boyfriend the image of having a naive, pretty and sweet-natured girlfriend, so I calmly held up my glass and swallowed a big mouthful of water.

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是吗？我早就想到四川旅游了！你们那儿一定有很多傻憨的熊猫吧？前阵子二十几只熊猫亮相的影片你看过了吗？

shìma ？wǒ zǎo jiù xiǎngdào Sìchuān lǚyóu le ！nǐmen nàr yīdìng yǒu hěn duō shǎhān de xióngmāo ba ？qiánzhènzi èrshí jǐ zhī xióngmāo liàngxiàng de yǐngpiàn nǐ kàn guò le ma ？

Really? I've wanted to go traveling to Sichuan for ages! You must have so many dumb pandas where you live, yeah? Did you see that film that recently came out of over 20 pandas?

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这群熊孩子就是闲不住，实不相瞒，我家那儿家家户户都养着熊猫，那只摔进世界最佳照片的熊猫宝宝和我家的一样，天然傻白甜。

zhè qún xióngháizi jiùshì xián bùzhù ，shíbùxiāngmán ，wǒjiā nàr jiājiāhùhù dōu yǎng zhe xióngmāo ，nà zhī shuāi jìn shìjiè zuìjiā zhàopiàn de xióngmāo bǎobao hé wǒjiā de yīyàng ，tiānrán shǎ bái tián 。

These little brats are really quite busy, to be honest, every household around where I'm from has a panda as a pet. That panda cub that "fell" into the world's best photograph is the same as the ones at my house, naturally naive and sweet.

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我是真的很想去四川看看，听说川妹子个个傻白甜，又烧得一手好菜。是理想人妻呢！

wǒ shì zhēnde hěn xiǎngqù Sìchuān kàn kan ，tīngshuō chuānmèizi gègè shǎ bái tián ，yòu shāo de yī shǒu hǎocài 。shì lǐxiǎng rénqī ne ！

I do really want to go and see Sichuan. I hear Sichuan girls are all young, pretty and naive, as well as being able to cook good food. They really make ideal wives!

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咳咳！四川气候温润，我们巴蜀女子确是皮肤白皙又甜美，个个像花一样，但是并不傻，岂能插在你们这些牛粪上！

hài hài ！Sìchuān qìhòu wēnrùn ，wǒmen bāshǔ nǚzǐ què shì pífū báixī yòu tiánměi ，gègè xiàng huā yīyàng ，dànshì bìngbù shǎ ，qǐnéng chā zài nǐmen zhèxiē niúfèn shàng ！

Ha ha! Sichuan has a humid climate. Our Sichuan women really have milky white skin, each one of them like flowers, but they're not naive, so I don't think they'd take if you shove them in a cow pie like you!

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我就是刚才那个找阿牛的啊，哈哈哈，你个傻瓜。

wǒ jiùshì gāngcái nàge zhǎo Ā Niú de ā ，hā hā hā ，nǐ gè shǎguā 。

I'm the guy who was looking for Aniu just now, ha ha. You idiot.

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是你交不到吧...那你在那边傻笑个什么劲？

shì nǐ jiāo bùdào ba ...nà nǐ zài nàbian shǎxiào ge shénme jìn ？

Actually you couldn’t get one right...Then what are you smirking at?

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这种装笨、装傻的女生就是在扮猪吃老虎，让所有的男生都想来帮助她。最后她就被养肥，真的变成猪了。

zhèzhǒng zhuāng bèn 、zhuāngshǎ de nǚshēng jiù shì zài bànzhūchīlǎohǔ ，ràng suǒyǒu de nánshēng dōu xiǎng lái bāngzhù tā 。zuìhòu tā jiù bèi yǎng féi ，zhēnde biànchéng zhū le 。

This kind of girls tends to play dumb to take advantage of others. Every boy ended up helping her. In the end, she got fattened up like a real pig.

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你装傻啊？我们就是约昨天，七月一号！

nǐ zhuāng shǎ ā ？wǒmen jiùshì yuē zuótiān ，qīyuè yī hào ！

You're feigning innocence? We agreed on yesterday, the first of July!

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