User Comments - zhenlijiang

Posted on: Let's Just Be Friends

说得很对！

Posted on: Let's Just Be Friends

hehe, I guess you prefer ceremonious dumping?

Posted on: Let's Just Be Friends

Not so! Mm you're a cynic. But you say you are speaking from experience, which does count of course.

I don't think this question has been addressed yet--so is it any better to be let down gently, or should emphasis be on quickness? Would you prefer that she make some effort to save your face, or just be straight up?

Posted on: Let's Just Be Friends

So now I'm going to go and contradict what I said less than 24 hrs ago.
to be blunt about it if the girl says let's just be friends, she just does not have those feelings for the guy, absolutely doesn't want him to persist! He has no reason to hope

But there is some hope--though this applies only when you aren't already friends to begin with, and still means we shouldn't 放弃 our ability to recognize, as John said.

I don't know that this happens anywhere in the world besides Japan, but for the past maybe 20 yrs now (this is a byproduct of a popular TV dating show from back then) there's been another option for a girl to say to a boy she's not really attracted to in that way. She may say （じゃあ ...）ともだちから。 (Ja ...) tomodachi kara. "Well I guess we can start by being friends then" or "All right let's try out being friends first, see how we get along", something along those lines. She's letting him know she definitely can't reciprocate his feelings for her but is also conceding, because he does seem like a nice guy, that the possibility of her being able to grow to see him as a boyfriend can't be ruled out.
I bet with many couples that start out that way, the guy is so grateful and happy to be given the chance and thrilled not to be written off completely that he is consistently earnest and dedicated and ends up totally winning her heart.

Posted on: Let's Just Be Friends

Changye there are two kinds of ふる aren't there--one is dumping (dropping--how coldhearted!) a gf or bf. What the girl in the dialogue does is not dumping; it's the other kind, well, rejecting someone who wants to be her boyfriend. From the dictionaries I've consulted 甩 seems not to translate so much into the sense of "reject", seems primarily to be "dumping (casting away)".

你那么想我，我很感谢你。*停了一下后继续说* 可是……

好，记住了！You never know when you'll need this heartfelt and business-like (?) expression. 谢谢

Posted on: Let's Just Be Friends

Thanks Changye. Hmm "turned down", yeah. It's not quite as good is it, as the Japanese word ふられた which is a great, easy-to-use word to tell your friends you were, well, turned down (or also dumped).

So if I wanted to sum up this lesson dialogue I might say

有两个年轻的朋友，男的和女的。其实男孩儿喜欢这个女孩儿，很想她做他的女朋友。可是男孩儿被女孩儿甩了，真可怜！他们以后一如既往地做好朋友还是不可能的吗？ I guess (see, because I don't agree that there's absolutely no way for the two to go back to being good friends after that)?

When I see 我非常高兴！I'm afraid it would sound too glad, when it's a preface to turning someone down. But maybe I'm overevaluating the connotations of 高兴 here?

Posted on: Let's Just Be Friends

我看未必是你说的那样！

Posted on: Let's Just Be Friends

最重要的是男人说《我不会放弃你的》！好像女人听说这个意思就感觉满意！

哥！我跟你说，你这样很浪漫的男人都应该好好听取Jiaojie老师说的！ (^^)

But I'm a bit concerned now. That sounds a little too close to me to stalkerspeak bro ... you know how those people reason everything that way ... * kwx! *

Changye's right of course, to be blunt about it if the girl says let's just be friends, she just does not have those feelings for the guy, absolutely doesn't want him to persist! He has no reason to hope. He can pick up on that--or truly invite her contempt. Seems a pity, when you could still be "just" friends ...

Posted on: Let's Just Be Friends

那么 Changye 我想请你‘老内行’的意见，呵呵。
女人诚恳地说“真的很感激你的心意，可是……”这样（don't know how to say that in Chinese!--そんな風に思ってくれているなんて、うれしいよ本当に。 * longish pause * だけど…　which in English is something like "I'm touched that you feel that way about me. I really do appreciate it.  * longish pause * But ..." argh that sounds awful in the English. For those of you who don't read Japanese I promise, this English sounds much worse than the Japanese.） 比较好接受，还是不行？其实我一直想知道。

还有一个问题。据我所知，英语里好像没有日语的‘ふる・ふられる furu / fura-reru’ (in English you have these what seem to me quite strong words like "reject") 这样比较轻松的说法。这篇课里描写的就是‘ふった・ふられた’的场面吧。汉语呢？有没有正合适的翻译？

这篇课我觉得很实用，呵呵。谢谢CPod。
一会儿见！

Posted on: Christmas Presents

Hmm so I guess 小学館中日辞典 is off then. Too bad, I liked their definition.

* apologies for going off-topic *